A Toronto Transformation

When Vulnerability Isn’t Enough

You don't have to be constantly in full bloom. Sometimes we need a winter underground.

I talk a lot about the importance of being vulnerable.

And it is. It’s so important.

There is no love, no triumph, no real life without vulnerability.

But something I don’t always mention, when I’m talking about vulnerability is how to cope when you’ve stood naked with your flaws written all over you for the world to see, and it just doesn’t work.

When the deep, raw, vulnerability of giving your heart, or sharing your talent or just of really trying your hardest at something, isn’t enough.

When there is no one there to receive the love, when there’s no applause, when your experiment just flat fails.

And you know it’s not a case where giving more or trying harder, trying again, will get you the result you were hoping for.

When failure inevitably comes calling, what do you do?

I think that often, the people who recover quickly from life’s crushing disappointments, the ones who can stand to be vulnerable, not just once, but time and time again, are the ones who have built lives for themselves that don’t just revolve around one all-important thing.

They don’t just have one obsession, one person or cause or creation that they live for.

Their interests are many, and their lives are so full that when one part of it falls apart, no matter how tragically, and how much it breaks their heart, they’ve got things to get them up, raring to go, in the morning, people who need them, projects to be completed.

You don’t have to be vulnerable with every person all the time. It’s ok to take a moment, to curl in on yourself and try to heal a bit before opening yourself up  again to the possibilities vulnerability brings.

You don’t have to be constantly in full bloom. Sometimes we need a winter under ground.

Have passion, drive and determination, yes, but don’t make any one thing, any one person your reason for being.

Be vulnerable, yes, but don’t throw everything you have into any one thing.

Always keep a little for yourself.

8 Responses to When Vulnerability Isn’t Enough

  • Manda says:

    Love, love, love, LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE this.

    It’s a lesson that I learned in 2013 like no other.

    And, to be fair, I learned it in years past too. But 2013 REALLY made me learn it for good, I think.

    • metamorphocity says:

      Haha. I think it’s a lesson I’ll always have to repeat to myself. I know it, but it never hurts to have a reminder!

  • Rachel says:

    Beautiful, and so true. I have found that the fear of not getting a good response to my vulnerability is what keeps me from being vulnerable, more times than not. But realizing that not every act of courage is going to get a standing ovation has been helpful. It’s good to remember that that’s not necessarily what it’s about.

    • metamorphocity says:

      Absolutely! And I think there’s a difference between allowing yourself to be vulnerable when that’s what’s needed to move forward and just recklessly opening up your chest and throwing your heart at everything you see. There’d be heart-spatter everywhere!

Follow me around, why dontcha?

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Affiliate Link Disclosure
Actions taken from the hyperlinks on this blog may yield commissions for Metamorphocity.com.

Copyright ©  All Rights Reserved.