A Toronto Transformation

Little Luxuries – Time

gold clock and books

Lately when I think about luxuries, I dream about time.

Just over a year ago, I spoke to the man I’d agreed to marry for the last time. When it became painfully clear that he was not, in fact, planning to come back to me as he had so tearfully promised to do when he flew out of my city, I got busy.

It’s how I deal with heartache. I hate to wallow and cry for any longer than I can possibly help, so I throw myself into work, projects, school, friends, whatever is available to me. I know that distraction won’t stop the pain, but I do think it can make it more manageable when you let it in a little bit at a time in between doing a million awesome things.

I said no to sitting alone in my apartment watching sad movies and yes to everything else. I cultivated new friendships, nurtured old ones. I worked out like a champ, I saw shows, I took photos, I slept in a tent! I volunteered, I cooked, I made things, and I wrote all over the internet every chance I got.

But I must admit, while I’ve built all of this really positive momentum, there are times when I just want off this track. Just for a minute. Everything in my calendar just feels too important to give up but I find myself dreaming about a quiet weekend spent in my apartment knowing that all my friends are busy and the internet is broken worldwide, so I’m not missing anything there.

I want to lie in my bathtub and watch bad tv until I’m ready to get into my bed and read a good book. And then I want to sleep for ten hours. I want no obligations, no shoulds.

I just want a little time.

Do you guys ever feel this way? What do you do when your schedule starts to overwhelm you?



8 Responses to Little Luxuries – Time

  • Rachel says:

    I wish the internet would break at least once a day. I am so addicted. When my schedule overwhelms me, I plan a getaway…even when I shouldn’t be leaving town. It is utterly amazing what one or two days in a new place can do for me.

    • metamorphocity says:

      Hmmm. Maybe I can sneak away for a weekend. Or better yet, pretend to sneak away and then just stay in my apartment!

  • Rosie says:

    You should definitely make a little ‘you time’ if you can. It can be just as positive and life affirming as all the busy ‘important’ things that you have going on. For me it’s a bath and a good book, or sitting in the sun with a good book – there’s always a good book involved. And sitting. Sitting and reading. Make some space in your life to do just what you crave – it will refresh you!

  • Honestly, I feel this way all the time. There are so many things I love and I find it difficult to give any of them up! Sometimes I even relish it when someone flakes on me on a weekend, because it means I get a whole unplanned night to myself. 🙂 One thing I occasionally do that makes me giddy with joy as if I’m doing something totally naughty is just block off an entire weekend. I tell people I’m busy, set a few goals for the weekend (and the goals can be fun stuff, like starting a new book or doing a craft project), and fiercely guard the time. It’s like a secret vacation!

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